I had a ring and a sheitel — and the weight that was still at the forefront of my mind

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or years I davened to be thin. “Just fifty pounds, please,” I’d plead during Shema Koleinu. “Even thirty and then I’ll never ask for anything again.”

I’d fall asleep begging for the weight to disappear overnight. I’d wake up and immediately check the mirror to see if I had lost the childhood pudge. I was so sure in my tefillos, so positive in my whispered negotiations with Hashem. And yet, despite my prayers and despite the extreme diets, exercise, and constant prodding of my parents, the weight never left me. I wondered if Hashem was simply saying no.

Despite my size, I got married relatively young. I had a ring and a sheitel — and the weight that was still at the forefront of my mind. And then, my oldest daughter was born. I watched her grow with awe. She’s beautiful. She looks like both me and my husband, but thin. Skinny. The real-life skinny I’d always davened to be. And just like that, I realized Hashem did not say no to me. Instead, He answered my tefillos through my daughter.

Every once in a while, I’d worry that this was too good to be true. Maybe her genes would catch up with her and she’d soon look like I did. That didn’t happen. My daughter grew taller, thinner, and more beautiful by the year. I shopped for clothes for her with delightful abandon. I knew that whatever I brought home would look even better on her than it did on the rack. I’d sometimes bring her shopping with me just to feel the warm attention of the saleswomen wooing this lovely, thin beauty.