This year, I’ll be thinking of Yitzy. I’ll be thinking of his Chanukah neis

There is a machlokes haposkim about what to have in mind while lighting the menorah. Some say to have in mind the neis of the pach hashemen. Others say to have in mind the neis of the milchamah. I hope I’m still yotzei this year, because it is unlikely I will have anything on my mind other than my brother-in-law Yitzy Sutofsky a”h.

The first time I met Yitzy was years before his sister became my wife (perks of marrying your neighbor).  At the time, I worked in a local day camp in Pittsburgh, where he was a second grade camper. Fun, energetic, and a real baal middos, Yitzy was every counselor’s dream. As he got older, this became only truer, as nothing makes life easier than when the best kid on the court is a mensch, allowing everyone to grow and shine. I was impressed with Yitzy as a camper, but our interactions were limited to the few summers I spent back in Pittsburgh. They stopped altogether when I left for yeshivah in Eretz Yisrael the summer after 12th grade, but three summers ago I got engaged to Yitzy’s sister Chaya, and as the newly minted brother-in-law, it was on me to become as much of a part of the family as I could. That’s how I found myself at the pizza store, several Little League games, and even in Hershey Park with Yitzy.

As the months went by, I came to know Yitzy not just as a geshmake kid with a killer fastball, but as an aspiring bar mitzvah bochur who knew how to be serious as well. He openly admired the rosh kollel and other talmidei chachamim, he loved to learn, and he davened with the fire and purity only children know. In my wedding video, you can see him shuckeling in the front, eyes closed, during the chuppah, pouring out his heart to Hashem for the brand new chassan and kallah.