You’re just living there because you have to, a voice inside me pressed again. Was it true?

Elka

The train station was just as busy and crowded as it had been when I arrived, but this time it didn’t feel strange. The sites were still exciting, but I was now familiar with this foreign city where my grandparents lived. I sat on a bench watching the crowd of people moving in and out, Bubbe and Zeide beside me. Staring at my grandparents, I tried to memorize their faces. Who knew when I would see them again?

“I’ll miss you, Bubbe,” I whispered as we watched the train pull into the station.

“I’ll miss you too.” Bubbe kissed me on the top of my head. “Tell your Mama I say hello, and give a kiss to everyone for me.”

I clutched my suitcase and stepped forward toward the train. The young couple who was supposed to be traveling with me stepped toward the train as well. Then the train doors opened and the three of us stepped into the car. Turning around as I got to the door, I saw Bubbe and Zeide waving at me. I swallowed hard, waved back and turned around to sit down. The couple sat in the seat across from me, and I settled myself against the window. As I looked out, there were Bubbe and Zeide, as close to the window as they could get from the platform, waving goodbye. And then the train picked up steam and we moved faster and faster, and I watched them waving until they disappeared from sight.

“So,” said Chana, the young woman who was also going to Palestine, “I hear you live there.”

“In Palestine? Yeah.” I nodded.

“So, what’s it like?”

I couldn’t tell if she was just trying to be nice or if she really wanted to know.

“It’s very different from here,” I said, jerking my head in the direction we had just come from.

“Oh, surely,” she breathed, her eyes taking on an excited glow. “Palestine. Eretz Yisrael. Just saying that makes me shiver. But I’ve never been there, so tell me. What’s it like to actually live in such a special place?”