As a parent, I like to think of teacher gifts as a bit of insurance

It’s that time of year — parties, doughnuts, and a slew of teacher gifts. As a parent, I like to think of teacher gifts as a bit of insurance: I’m sorry about the six times Yehudis forgot her homework and the fact that the impulse-control center of her brain is a work in progress. But really, it’s about appreciation.

So what do teachers appreciate? Is it mugs emblazoned with World’s Best Teacher (given to seven World’s Best Teachers)? Is it another scent to add to the Leaning Tower of Diffusers in their Costco closet? We went undercover in the teachers’ room to get real recommendations from the experts. (“I love my mug collection!” exclaimed one teacher. “I use every diffuser I get… eventually,” said another.)

Others confess to regifting. A single present might go to a dozen teachers in a dozen schools until it finally reaches someone who loves Blueberry-Waffle scented candles. Every teacher might one day be zocheh to see the gift that first came to her return to her children, now teachers, in the distant future.

Here’s what your kids’ teachers really want, conveniently ranked for you based on your zeeskeit’s classroom behavior.

Perfect Angel: My child has never done a single disruptive thing in their life.

A manicure.

Know your audience. Your tenth grader’s rebbi might not appreciate this one as much as your daughter’s morah. But a manicure is an inexpensive thank-you that will be appreciated, even if the teacher has Play-Doh stuck under her nails 90 percent of the time. Maybe especially then.